god I'm so scared
but I think I've learned that this is the sensation of touching the edge of form
if I'm right about that, it's not unsafe, it's just *raw*, just ragged electric
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it's possible that I'm alone, that I *am* the minimum viable awareness
and also there are infinite ways for that not to be the case
ethically, seems best for me to act as if I am not alone, but that conclusion was never hard to get to
in this kind of situation, where there's a single irreducible possibility bordering an infinite spectrum, it seems that the arrangement is structural
I wrote this a while back:
> btw I've started seeing the concept of "satan" as a necessary feature of "heaven" - not someone banished, but a representation of the necessary escape hatch
feels like that
it's possible that I am alone, that I *am* the minimum viable awareness - but perhaps that's a necessary feature of the experience of aliveness, and not something actually damning