I find all the things that I and we are doing have been creating a sense of wonder that I haven’t felt since before the pandemic. I realized that I started Lightward Empowerment in January of 2020, after the full, vibrant year of 2019, a year where I felt alive in so many ways. I was exploring all the different parts of me, areas that needed space to become more real. And it all felt so real—I was thriving in my photography career (nationally published and getting clients who were amazing), traveling to new places, meeting new people in random places like the Spice Girls concert, having intellectual and heart-centered conversations with friends in Scotland, skinny dipping in the Pyrenees Mountains, working out 5 days a week with a trainer we deeply connected with who saw me where I was at and inspired me to something greater, learning to speak aloud my desires next to Isaac, overcoming my internal fear of success and money, having the most epic 30th birthday party with 100 of my closest friends from around the world, being deeply loved by my husband. It was the perfect cocktail that made me come alive, which inspired me to create Lightward Empowerment—helping empower others to come alive themselves. (random note: it’s incredible how much I’ve experienced in my short time on earth. It’s wild how much life and the world we’ve experienced as a couple in the 7 years we’ve been together. Hey, hi, forever grateful!) And I’m grateful I started it. I’ve worked with 15 empowerment coaching clients, started Empowered Human Academy (fucking LOVE this project), created Lightward Together (hey, fyi, if you are desiring to be a part of a really vibrant and ALIVE community of people who are actively diving into their own empowered life, join us—it’s really dope.) It’s really beautiful (and powerful) what can be created from a space of health and feeling good. I found myself really really reallllllly burnt out in April. After being at home for a year all while running all the different facets of Lightward Empowerment, I felt depleted and apathetic, which are my signs of burnout and unhealth. So I took May mostly off of coaching calls. I needed it. I recalled, during that month away, that I’d felt these feelings of apathy before, like an old friend that wasn’t welcome in my house but also was invited to remind me of what I actually want and need in my life. You see, I’m a fucking vibrant human being who dreams crazy big romantic dreams, who is earnest and cares deeply about living a beautiful life. And when I’m burnt out, I don’t want any of it—I become disconnected from my light. Luckily, I’ve been here before and I know that diving into my art and my dreams and giving myself space (not filling it with calls all the time) makes me feel the most alive. It makes me feel well. It makes me feel like I can do anything—and I do, in that empowered state. It looks like starting Lightward Empowerment. It looks like taking photos of nude men as part of my art. It looks like working out consistently and feeding my body well. I was disconnected to myself in April. And I was giving from an empty cup. But y’all, I love COMING ALIVE. I love BEING alive. So I've made really intentional decisions to change some things in my schedule, in my work and how I spend my time, to ensure I give myself space to come alive again. I’m happy to report that he’s coming back, the Abe that was always there, but was just tired. The guy who believes that he can do and experience anything he wants to experience. Who romanticizes about what’s possible. Who creates environments for himself and others to feel gorgeous and powerful and loved. Who is confident in his body and being. Who doesn’t apologize for being all that he is. Who feels deeply. Who thinks critically and strategically. Who honors and celebrates all of his nuances. So here’s to coming alive again. Here’s to honoring the parts of yourself that want to BE more real in your life. Here’s to reminding ourselves that we have access to our light if we give ourselves space to allow our light to express itself. Here’s to listening to what we need in order to feel alive and here’s to doing something about it. Here’s to normalizing loving yourself and your desires fully and freely. Here’s to me. And here’s to you. What do you need to do to come alive again? How can you move toward your aliveness with your next thought? LOVE. Abe
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