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Friday, October 2 Hey, Happy Friday! It feels really good to be connected to you – this is newsletter number seven and we are just getting started. Here’s to more depth, exploration, trusting and believing in what’s possible. It’s a good day, because we are here, present with this moment. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being you. lightward.com/newsletter
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We are starting a podcast!
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Yes! Yes! Yes! Empowered Human Academy – we are starting a podcast! And couldn’t be more excited. We’ve been working really hard behind the scenes to get this project up and running. What started as a mini-series of conversations (within a different, larger project) developed a life energy of its own, and that force is now a podcast, called Empowered Human Academy. You are the first to know about this exciting new, young, vibrant thing. With us on this adventure are some incredibly talented friends (thank you Olivia, Rebekah, Jonny, Mathieu, and Resonate!). The results are going to land on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, and in video form on YouTube, IGTV, and Facebook. This whole process has been one gorgeous ride, friends. Each episode has held something incredible, as we dive deep into empowerment, wellness, life and living, speaking with artists, CEOs, psychologists, lawyers, coaches, meditation experts, and more. I believe that we are all here in a space of a collective awakening, and these conversations offer a sacred inner circle where we can all learn and grow and heal, and create the life we always dreamed of creating. We launch the Empowered Human Academy podcast on Tuesday, October 6th, with our very first conversation – and we’ll release one conversation every week after that. In anticipation of launch day, we want you to be a part of our launch squad! What is a launch squad, you ask? It’s all of you who want in on sharing your excitement on October 6th – on your social media, with your colleagues, family and friends. And we’ve got you covered – we created a document that includes a social-friendly announcement image, and a sample post can you make your own. :) Friend, will you join us in sharing our podcast next Tuesday as part of our launch squad? If you’re down, here’s the document with everything you need for launch day! In the meantime, you can check out empoweredhumanacademy.com – you’re the first to glimpse what we’ve made here. Onward and upward. X
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“That which you consider to be good”
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I was listening to someone speak last week, and they used this expression. It wasn’t the first time, in retrospect, but this was the first time that I paid attention to it. These words are disarming to me. Particularly in the political climate of the moment. Not “good”, but, “that which you consider to be good.” Intellectual exercise: let’s reframe “good” and “bad” as intrinsic preferences. This isn’t about morality, yet – let’s just replace these concepts with the idea that some people just innately prefer one thing, and others another. What does this mean? If we’re just honest about our preferences, and active in steering towards what we prefer, it means a natural structure arises. Nothing pre-defined, nothing prescriptive – it’s just natural that people who prefer to steer the canoe will end up in the back, and those who don’t will sit in the front. (Thank you, rural childhood, for this most unloaded of metaphors. 🙏) And with enough people sorted into each camp, we might then evolve a system for making sure that back-o’-the-canoe-dwellers have an understood way to match up with front-o’-the-canoe-’ers. Now, let’s make this about morality. At some level, it’s obvious that opposing definitions of moral good also yield natural structure. You at odds with the king? Go start your own kingdom. I’m simplifying, but the point holds: history (and nature) is full of rebellion/dissent/disagreement resulting in populations fracturing into factions. And maybe they’re actively in opposition for a few generations, and maybe a little later they remember that trade is useful, and maybe later enough folks have moved back and forth and invented their own new ideas that the original boundaries serve everyone a little less well. And then, maybe, someone has a new forbidden idea and it all happens again. What if we looked at our most fervently held ideas of good and bad, and thought of them as hints for structure? When mutual resistance is felt, when it feels like two groups are pushing up against each other, trying to get past the other to some place over there, … what if we just got out of each other’s way? And accepted, without angst or rancor, that those folks over there just genuinely prefer something totally different? What if we each just dropped the resistance, lost the friction, and slipped by each other? I strongly suspect that, in getting out of each other’s way on the way to where we want to be, we’d each find room enough for what we wanted.
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This only works if we can stomach the idea that I can enjoy my own intrinsic definition of good over here, while you enjoy your possibly-totally-different intrinsic definition of good over there. That’s a must. And if I’m being honest, this idea is absolutely found in my own intrinsic definition of good. We were already being pretty abstract, but here we find the pattern addressing itself: there are people for whom this idea does not work. And here, too, we find hints for structure, structure without judgement. Like, if we don’t agree on this, we probably shouldn’t date. And if there are enough of us on each side, maybe we should have our own countries. My good is not necessarily opposed to yours. Genuine incompatibility results in structure. I offer this concept as something purposefully a little abstract, an idea to roll around in your head, to keep with you as you go through your day. When an ideological clash seems inescapable, consider this: maybe those who believe the toilet paper roll should hang on the wall side should use that bathroom, and everyone who is correct (kidding) should use the other one. Consider re-visualizing all that friction as a smooth, slippery surface, allowing the natural structure suggested to just pop into place, in accordance with the energies at play. There’s always a place for everything. There’s always space. So. I think that the moment where you can’t bear to push against, any longer, is an invitation. And it may not require both sides seeing this at once. Perhaps you can stop pushing, and perhaps you can slip on by, on to that which you consider to be good. You might have to leave something behind – but then, you already left your resistance, yeah? And if your identity can handle that, then you’ve successfully identified with your good, instead of with your anti-bad. Which means that, as you go, you are already carrying your self, which means that you have everything you need. You’ll be okay. :)
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Wellness for you, and for me
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Here’s your weekly reminder to breathe. Inhale. Exhale. It’s simple. And profound. How has your breathing been the last week? Have you allowed this energy force to flow through your body? Have you been tense and held your breath a lot? Either way, take this opportunity to breathe. As you inhale and exhale through your nose, in an upright position, notice where the breath is showing itself in your body. Is it pointing out places where you feel loose? Where you feel tight? Where you feel sore? Where you feel tired? Allow yourself to let your breath show you what it wants to. When we become aware of the present moment, we see things that we so often overlook or ignore. Your breath is your friend. Truly, think about how incredible it is to breathe as much as we do, with as much freedom as we do. I write about the breath each week because of how important it is for us. Utilize this powerful, ever-present gift. Exploring mindfulness: What are your thoughts creating? I’ve been thinking about everything as a practice. No one is ever perfect at anything, other than maybe doctors performing heart surgeries or astronauts launching off to space, but even then – while the operations and missions might be perfect, the doers might have anxiety or have to move through their own fear. So, I’ll posit that nothing is ever perfect, and therefore that we are always in the practice of creating and doing and achieving and being. Humans practice what they know. And I’ve been thinking about how, for so long, I was in the practice of negativity that created negative thoughts that created negative things in my life. I’ve always been a fairly optimistic person and yet I also was deeply invested in the story and practice of fear, and of anxiety, and of feeling a sense of worthlessness. I was good at it. I was really good at being optimistic, but I absolutely also practiced telling myself that I wasn’t good enough, or smart enough, and that I was just generally not enough. And gradually, over the years, my awareness grew – and I came to realize that those automatic fear responses were the direct results of my own practice of self-doubt, my own practice of never trusting myself. Oh, boo, it was so strangely comfortable in that space, because I knew how to do it well. I just accepted that I would be chronically in pain or obese to the point that it would cause serious health issues or that it would keep me from my future incredible husband. And I came to realize that my thoughts were creating the reality around me. I didn’t move my body when I was in the practice of fear, body shaming and self-loathing. I was in an insanely toxic relationship when I was in the practice of feeling like I didn’t deserve to have my hand held. I looked at others and thought their life was better than mine when I was in the practice of forgetting my own agency. It wasn’t until I started to think incredible thoughts about my life and my self that things really started to change. And it was really uncomfortable at first. I would take three steps forward and 20 steps back. But the more I did it, the more I saw things start to change. I began practicing literally the opposite of what I had been doing all along and I began to trust myself in a way I never thought I could. Your thoughts are extremely powerful and extremely important in creating a life that is joyful and full and authentically you. What thoughts do you have on a normal basis? Look at every aspect of your life – what are those thoughts creating in you, in your home, in your relationships and in how you view the world? You have such an incredible capacity for good and your body WANTS to feel good – that’s why we are alive! Look at nature – if it wasn’t inclined toward health and goodness, we never would have made it out of the oceans. Life wants to live, life wants to THRIVE! And we are a part of the earth, y’all. So: I encourage you to create thoughts that are so in favor of you. Once you do, everything around you will be impacted for the better. Including, and beginning with, you. I believe in you, fully! Abe
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Honestly, we love giving. That’s a real thing. :) We don’t do giveaways every week – only when we feel led and excited to give. In celebration of launching our very first podcast, we are giving away one pair of Apple AirPods so you can listen to our podcast in style. :)
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The days are full, and good. :) We are learning the practice of emotional autonomy. Not to be separate, but to be at the ready with our own fullness, in all places and all times. Starting to figure it out. :) Be well, from that wellspring (pun intended) you carry within.
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